How to Be Confident Yet Humble

I'm reading this book called 'The Success Factor'. I got it from the Popular bookstore. It's a 2-in-1 with 'The Confidence Factor' book. I like these self-help books. I just had dinner, simple dinner I make when I am by myself. I played the songs on my playlist like 'Silence', 'Friends' and 'All Falls Down'. I like most of the songs on hitz.fm and mix.fm. Last weekend, my mum and brother came to visit me. Next weekend, I'll be on another flight (just a few more days). I am literally on a plane so often these days. The most important part of all of this is that I am happy where I am now and I like the new job. I really did not like the idea of being transferred here at the beginning. Also, because I was not sure where I was going to stay. I figured things out all at the last minute. I was not too sure if I would like this new place but given some time, I am starting to be really fond of it. I remember driving home and my car stereo was playing the song 'All Falls Down'. I was focusing on the lyrics and it said 'I'll be fine'. And that is exactly what I told myself 'Darling, you'll be fine. Yes, I'll be fine.'

So, here I am going to share some tips on how I stay confident. Confidence and arrogance are often confused and there is a fine line that separates the two. Humility paired with humbleness and compassion/kindness is what separates someone from being confident and not arrogant. Urgh, I cannot stand arrogant and snobbish people. Please, no. Even during high school times, I always avoided anybody who appeared too snobbish to be true. I'd rather be by myself than in the company of someone with traits that I have zero tolerance. I try my best to ensure I stay confident but not arrogant.

At some point in my life, I felt that I did not have enough confidence. Here, I will share how I developed my confidence and how to be comfortable in your own skin.Confidence can also be shaky, it can decrease or increase depending on our life circumstances so it can be good to be reminded of how to stay confident always:

• Know yourself. Accept your positives and negatives. By being aware of the good traits you have and the things you need to improve, you will be more open-minded. You will truly believe in your heart that you have good characteristics so you feel confident. You need to truly believe it within yourself and not just say that you do. You also need to know either realise it yourself or hear it from somebody, your negative traits. Never try denying your negative traits. It will make you snobbish and think you are perfect. Also, accepting your negative traits and thinking it is OK to continue with the negative traits without improving yourself can also make you a snobbish/arrogant person. Focusing too much on your negative traits will make you feel low confident whereas too much obsession with your strengths makes you altruistic. 

• Do things you enjoy and focus on things you are good at. Never ever underestimate the power of doing something you enjoy. It gives you the inner confidence you really need. It brings that genuine smile and happiness that are indescribable. It gives you that feeling of home doing something you enjoy. With happiness comes confidence. They come hand-in-hand. If you are unhappy, there is a high chance you will have low self-esteem or confidence. Do what makes you happy considerately. Think of others, think of yourself. Balance it. 

• Do not compare yourself to anybody. Like they say, look up to be inspired. Look down to be thankful. You look at more successful people to give you that inspiration for you to be better. You look at less fortunate people and have compassion. You want to help them out. You feel blessed that you are in a better position and you do what you can to help out. This brings me to the next point. Why and how can you ever compare yourself with people? First of all, you are never in the exact same position as anyone in the world. How can you compare apples and oranges? They are 2 different fruits. You need to compare like to like but the truth is nobody in the world is exactly the same. They could be different from you in terms of race, religion, gender, age, experience, social status, country, parental influence, education, life experience, personality, traits, likes, dislikes and the list goes on. So, how in the world can you compare yourself with another person? If you have an answer, drop it in the comment box below. 

• To develop confidence, you need to give back to society and help other people, animals, the planet, the poor, the sick, the less privileged. Giving really helps you develop than inner happiness and warmth within your heart. You will feel more grounded. You will feel that you are making a difference in the world or in your neighbourhood or anywhere you are. Give more, worry less. Do what you can. Give somebody special a gift. This too can be a source of inner confidence.

• Surround yourself with positive people. This is as crucial as the other points mentioned. There can be nothing more draining than a toxic person draining the positivity out of you. Stay away. Be mindful. If you cannot stay away completely, set a boundary or a barrier to not allow them too much in your life.  How can you be a confident person if there is someone constantly pulling you down? This does not apply to situations that you cannot change. If this is a person you see on a constant basis, keep it professional or on-the-surface. There will never be perfect people. You might find some people like this in your life. Accept it, after all, you cannot change another person. You just need to change the way you deal with the situation. It is OK to hang around with these people but just be careful that they do not affect your confidence.

• Finally, worry less and smile more. Smiling has a magnificent and magical power to increase the confidence within you. A genuine smile can help you feel much calmer and confident. It makes you feel that everything will be OK. You got the hang of this. You will do fine. That is what a smile does. At the end of the day, you really want to just live one day at a time. Be confident with yourself and trust that the future will sort itself out so long as you do your part today.

I wanted to make this blogpost short and simple. Hope this inspired you to be a more confident yet humble version of you. Have a wonderful week. Take care everyone.

XOXO