How to Be Above Average in Anything You Do

Dear all,

Today I am going to write a motivational post that many people can relate to whether you are a student, in college, working adult, retired, housewife and the list goes on.

In anything I do, I give my best. If I cannot or do not want to give my best, there is a high chance I will not do it or I will put it on my to-do-list and do it later on in life when I feel full-hearted about it. Some things I am afraid of doing like the 'flying fox' last July and I pushed myself to do it to overcome my fear. So it depends on the situation; sometimes you need to listen to what you want to do and sometimes you need to push yourself. Whatever it is, look at the possible outcomes, if it is a mostly positive outcome then I say go for it. 

In this 21st century and in this year 2017, most of us are driven by modern technology and all the social media there is in the world. I remember when I was in primary school, I did not even have a phone. In secondary school, these social media started appearing and I started having a basic non-smart phone. It was easier to stay focus and live the present. I feel that one of the reason people are slacking in work and study is the pressure of social media and too much time spent online looking at non-beneficial things. To be fair, there are a lot of knowledge you can gain from reading online articles, online news and it is a method of socialising with friends. These are all the good side of being online. However, I still believe that in order to excel in anything you do, you must have strong focus. In order to feel happy about what you do, you must live in the moment and feel content at heart. In order to do these things, you must divide your time well. There is a time for everything. To be above average in whatever you do, you must have strong will and strong focus. Believe that there is nothing more interesting at that moment than the thing you are doing at that time. I know I know, work and studying are not extremely interesting most of the time. However, the truth is life is not all about having fun, going for holidays, doing leisure activities and being on cloud nine all the time. Reality is about waking up, doing chores, working, studying, building healthy relationships with the people around you, commitments, cleaning up, the car, the house and then the spouse, the parents, the kids, the grandkids and the list goes on. 

In between those life-long commitments, comes the vacations, life events and all the rainbow and butterflies. What I am concerned about is that social media is implying that life is all about the latter and less of the former. All you see mostly is the excitement, vacations, good food, happy moments. The reason is that is what people wished life is all about. Those people include me ;) However, for me, it is sort of like a getaway where you only share positive and beautiful things because all of us naturally enjoy seeing beautiful and pleasant things only. That is why I am slightly concerned especially for the younger generation that they know their priorities and not get carried away. To be above average in life, you need to focus on what your life is all about. It is not about impressing people, it is about being content at heart, achieving your goals in life and doing good for yourself, for your family and for society. The problem is that when I see younger teenagers, I wonder if they even have a life goal or is it all about impressing people on social media and simply having a great social life. I will not comment too much on this because I am aware different people have different priorities but even if they do not want to go to university the traditional way but have a goal of being a great chef or a great sportsman, that is a goal right there and I am proud of them for that. I know it is not always the mainstream method of going to school, get good grades, get a scholarship, go to university, become a doctor/lawyer/engineer/architect/anything fancy and get a job with a high salary. It is not always like that. People have different ambitions and I respect that and I feel that is necessary so there is more of a variety in the society and not always the same story, the same thing.

So from my observation of people who are above average, I would suggest some of these tips:

• Have good character. This is so underestimated and people always think how is this related to being above average but it definitely is. To climb the ladder of success, you need good character. Otherwise, you cannot go too far in life. There is a period when people do not like you and this will hinder further progress. Yes, you cannot please everyone but with good character it is not about pleasing people but about your day-to-day interaction with people regardless who they are.

• Manage your time well. Have a schedule, know what you need to do, know your deadlines and prioritise things that need to be done first.

• Good stress management. To be above average means that you will experience more stress than the average people do. That is fine. In times of difficulty, I always reminded myself that only pressure and strong heat creates the diamond. In order to shine like a diamond, you need to endure that temporary pressure and heat for a lifelong shine. The shine may fade with some dust accumulating but a quick polish will restore that shine. There is no need for extreme pressure and heat again. I believe in this malay proverb 'bersusah-susah dulu, bersenang-senang kemudian'. It is similar to the english proverb 'after the rain, comes the rainbow'. So yes, manage your stress well and the willingness to have stress will help you be above average.

• Believe in yourself. Anything seems impossible until it is done. Remember your dissertation or a very difficult report? How did it feel before accomplishing it? Not enough time, machines broke down, I don't know how to do this, there are no guidelines, etc . These are all common when you are doing something difficult but in the end, it is manageable with the correct approach and belief that you can do it. Do not compare yourself with others too much. Everyone has their own capabilities so believe in yours.

• Stay positive and restore your motivation. One of the reasons why I chose a motivational element for my blog was because I wanted to write something that I could write long-term. If I focused on only educational, the blog would no longer be applicable after I finish my education. To me, motivation is something needed at any stage of life you are in. I wanted to write something beneficial for people in the long-term because I enjoy writing and I have the patience to write long posts so motivation is the best option for me. I hope it benefits people from all over the world and it keeps us connected and motivated. I read a few comments in a few of my previous posts and replied to them today. It motivates me to write more when I realise that it really helps others and beneficial to them. I might not know all these people or met them in person but the fact that my writing made a big difference to their lives is something really big for me. If you want to read some of their comments you can go to: Popular Blog post

• Empathise, help and be kind to others. Life is not all about you and your achievements. Use your knowledge and expertise to benefit others and help them, Help your parents, your siblings, your family members, your friends, your neighbours and colleagues with a sincere intention. This really raises your status and makes you above average. Some people may appreciate it and some may not. Remember that your intention was to help others and make them happy and that is what matters the most. Your goal is accomplished. If they do not appreciate it then they may be average or a below average person because anyone above average should have good morale and character. Expecting everyone to be your level is difficult. If you spread goodness and do good, it is easy to expect people to do the same. The problem is everyone is at different levels at improving themselves. The other person may be better than you in other aspects so try to easily pardon them when possible. Empathise with people and try to understand why they are the way they are. 

• Put extra effort and prioritise. You can never have everything in life. Many people can dream to become perfect but it is impossible. You can be close to perfect but life is created in a way that nobody is perfect. Everyone has flaws and needs to improve in some aspects. Acknowledge your weakness and focus on your strengths. Work on always improving yourself. Identify your strength, this will increase your confidence. When you focus on 1 thing, you might slack on another. It may be temporary but focus on what you want to achieve one at a time. For example, if someone is studying and working at the same time, they may have less time to socialise. If working is definitely a priority at the time due to financial circumstances, go ahead and work but then in the person's attempt to ensure the family or friends do not feel neglected, keep in touch when you can. Make the effort to call, message or meet them in your free time. In terms of putting extra effort, if average people are only willing to do for example 10 a day, you do 12 a day if it is possible for you. Judge the circumstances carefully. Do not overwork. Instead, try to achieve a balance. This is all about your priorities in life. If you are single with no children, then it is possible to focus on yourself more. If you have children, your priorities change. So be your own judge of what you can put extra effort and what you can do without. For me, I would put extra effort in anything that makes me feel more positive and motivated. 

Hope this read has been beneficial for you. Have a great day and wonderful week ahead. Till my next post :) If you have any requests for a certain blog topic, please let me know xxxxx